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• Sunday, July 15, 2007
Just feel freaking tired lately. Nothing much to say about my life lately, nothing special.

Lie, did you lie to anyone before? I did, i bet everyone does. Are you afraid someday when people find out about your lies? Why does some people just want to lie to me? I prefer the cruel truth more than the lies. If you want to tell me a lie, hide it perfectly. Don't let me find it out. I am tired of lie, why every time i can figure it out when you tell a lie to me? If you don't want me to do anything to you, tell me. If you want me get out of your life, tell me. I don't want to suffer between your lies. Don't tell me your bullshit anymore.

If you don't believe me, don't ever trust me. You think i will harm you, believe it cause i will.

I try anything to change myself, i be truth to you. What i get in return is nothing, i didn't request much about you, just one smile is more than enough. What so great about your pass? Didn't i have one? I get over it, you? Staying there for nothing. You think he will come back for you? Dream on. Wanna forget someone? I can tell you that the secret how, is to accept someone. People just can't forget things. Trust me, i knew it more than you do. Love is the thing you scare of? You know how people conquer fear? Is to do it again. Hurt? Pain? That's what you tell yourself. When you born in to this world, you got nothing but yourself. I know is hard to put it down in a short period, but why you need to suffer about it?

Love, is that so hard to get? Just one relationship, can destroy your future relationship? I had no idea man, maybe i not involved with it yet. Or maybe i understand it more than you do? You want a reason that i love you? I can't tell you i can't find it, when i found it out. I know that was a answer to let me don't love you anymore. When i request something, i get nothing more than a reject. Are my request so hard to do? Or you just hiding something from me? Why someone can get something easily from you while i can't? What's the different between me and him? Just because i am the one who love you? Or i am the one you afraid to face with? Why i am the one who worry about you while you don't bother about it. Why i am the one who nervous when you are in trouble? Maybe last life i was a monk? That's why now i am so nice to people? Or maybe i am just a idiot? Why i need to do so many things to make you happy?

When ever i saw a couple, i smile because i hope someday we can become like them. When you look at a couple, your eyes tell me that you hate it. Because he is the one you want it? Because he is Handsome? Rich? Caring? Good Hearted? Cool? Yea, i admit. I got nothing, no outlook, not cool, and i am not rich. When you need help, i lend my hand to you. After it, you forget about it. Not because reward, i just want you to know i am beside you. People ask me why i need to help you while i am not you anyone, i just smile and don't know how to answer. Maybe that's what my heart want me to do. People ask me whether i tired with waiting, my answer always is no. Because i believe.

Trust, is something important while is hard to do. I trust you, no matter what. I believe in you. Everything you said to me. I believe it. When i said something, you think it was joke. Time is keep going on, while you still don't believe in me and understand me. I understand you, that's why i know i can believe in you. But you disappointed me every time. Last time, you said i am weak because i don't have my own decision. Am i really weak? I care about people feeling that's why i don't do my decision which will hurt other people or regret later. I might be stupid, i might slow in respond. But what i tell you is truth, that's what i can promise. I won't say we will together forever even we were couple because i don't believe in forever. Forever only last in our heart, our mind.

Handsome, what can you do with his face? Did his face can earn money?
Rich, money can finish anytime.
What's your perfect boyfriend? Got own life goal? Same interest with you? Can speak out sweet words?
If you don't mind, we can make things better together. What i need is the chance you give.
I will try my best to make you happy, i will be beside you every time you need me.
Don't ask forever from me, try to ask yourself. Can you give me forever, before ask me.
You afraid hurt and pain, so do i.
Don't afraid about your pass, i will accept it.
Don't always act tough, it will never helps you.
Don't ever try to lie to me unless you need to do so badly.
Don't always give me hints, try to tell me directly, it might be give you more surprise.
When i say i miss you or i love you, i mean it.

Blogged @ 7/15/2007 10:17:00 PM